Multiple sclerosis is My Living Hell

dark humour

All posts tagged dark humour by Multiple sclerosis is My Living Hell
  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction, and use AI to proof read and help solve this issue so you can understand it

    *This article is a fictional and darkly humorous portrayal of living with Multiple Sclerosis. Experiences of MS vary greatly between individuals.

    Multiple Sclerosis has stolen strength, memories, certainty and independence but it has not managed to destroy my humour. In this fictional letter, MS looks at the person whose life it invaded and proudly describes its cruellest work.*

    A Letter from Multiple Sclerosis – Living With an Invisible Disease

    Dear Human,

    We've been together a long time now.

    Long enough that I know your routines better than you do.

    Remember when you first met me?

    You thought I was tiredness.

    Stress.

    A trapped nerve.

    Vitamin deficiency.

    Bless you.

    I let you believe that for a while.

    I enjoy a slow entrance.

    Now look at us.

    You wake up every morning wondering which version of me you'll get.

    Some days I let you walk.

    Some days I borrow your legs.

    Keeps things interesting.

    Do you remember when you trusted your own body?

    I do.

    That was my favourite part.

    Watching that confidence disappear one tiny piece at a time.

    Not enough for anyone else to notice.

    Just enough for you.

    That little stumble.

    That forgotten word.

    The coffee cup you suddenly couldn't grip.

    The name you knew yesterday but couldn't remember today.

    Magnificent.

    The clever part wasn't hurting you.

    Pain is easy.

    Anyone can inflict pain.

    No...

    My masterpiece was making you doubt yourself.

    "Did that really happen?"

    "Am I imagining it?"

    "Perhaps I'm just getting older."

    Exactly.

    That's where I live.

    Not only inside your nerves...

    Inside your certainty.

    I've taught your immune system to attack the very wiring that makes you...

    You.

    A beautifully engineered act of friendly fire.

    Your own body became my accomplice.

    I hardly have to do any work anymore.

    The funny thing is...

    Everyone keeps asking what you've done today.

    As if surviving me isn't already a full-time occupation.

    They see you standing.

    They assume you're fine.

    They don't see the calculations.

    The balance.

    The fatigue.

    The pain.

    The electrical storms firing through your spine.

    The words disappearing halfway through a sentence.

    No...

    That's our little secret.

    I particularly enjoy introducing new symptoms without warning.

    Just when you think you've understood me...

    Surprise.

    Here's dizziness.

    Enjoy your lunch with swallowing problems.

    Fancy some burning feet?

    Let's throw in bladder urgency while you're standing in the supermarket queue.

    Why?

    Because I can.

    I have no rules.

    No timetable.

    No conscience.

    You call me unpredictable.

    I call it creativity.

    But then...

    Something rather annoying happened.

    You laughed.

    Not once.

    Not politely.

    Properly laughed.

    You made jokes about me.

    You named your mobility scooter.

    You turned your misery into stories.

    You started writing.

    People read them.

    Some cried.

    Some smiled.

    Some recognised themselves for the first time.

    That irritated me.

    You see...

    Diseases like me thrive on silence.

    On shame.

    On isolation.

    Every time you tell the truth...

    You steal a little of my power.

    Every time someone says...

    "That's exactly how I feel."

    ...I lose.

    Don't misunderstand me.

    I'm still here.

    I'll still hide your memories.

    I'll still tighten your muscles.

    I'll still steal tomorrow's energy before you've finished today.

    That isn't changing.

    But neither, it seems...

    Are you.

    You're still getting up.

    Still writing.

    Still laughing.

    Still refusing to become only my diagnosis.

    Honestly...

    You're becoming rather inconvenient.

    With the utmost professional irritation,

    Multiple Sclerosis

    P.S.

    I'll probably move your keys tomorrow.

    Just to remind you who's technically in charge.

    Wishing all the readers of this blog a happy week ahead peace love and light to All

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)
    ☣ This Is Not A Blog About MS This Is My Life With MS ☣

    Twitter@goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    **please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction, and use AI to help solve this issue so you can understand it **

    Many thanks you everyone who reads my blog, I really appreciate that you take time out of your day to read my blog.. A massive thanks to everyone as I just realised I have been doing this a year now

    What Kind of Person Am I ?

    People often ask me what I actually believe.

    Am I Wiccan?

    Yes.

    Am I Gnostic?

    Yes.

    Am I a Humanist?

    Absolutely.

    Some people see those ideas as contradictory.

    I don't.

    To me, they fit together like different pieces of the same puzzle.

    Wicca Taught Me to Respect Nature

    Not because nature is always kind.

    Nature can be brutal.

    Storms don't care about your feelings.

    Disease doesn't ask permission.

    Death keeps no appointments.

    Yet there is beauty in the rhythm of it all.

    The seasons change.

    Life grows.

    Life dies.

    Then somehow, life begins again.

    That deserves respect.

    Not blind worship.

    Respect.

    Gnosticism Taught Me to Ask Questions

    I've never been comfortable with anyone telling me what I must believe.

    Questions matter more than certainty.

    Who are we?

    Why do we suffer?

    Is consciousness more than electrical signals bouncing around a lump of grey matter?

    Maybe.

    Maybe not.

    The search itself has value.

    I'd rather spend my life asking difficult questions than accepting easy answers.

    Humanism Keeps My Feet on the Ground

    Whatever I believe about the universe, one thing remains certain.

    People matter.

    Kindness matters.

    Compassion matters.

    Critical thinking matters.

    If your beliefs don't make you a better human being...

    What's the point?

    Multiple Sclerosis Changed Everything

    MS stripped away the illusion that life is predictable.

    It taught me that bodies fail.

    Plans collapse.

    Tomorrow is never guaranteed.

    But it also taught me something unexpected.

    Humour survives.

    Sometimes laughter is the last act of rebellion left to us.

    If I can't beat MS...

    I can still laugh at it.

    Sometimes I imagine the Devil chasing me down the road in a mobility scooter while I shout back, "You'll have to go faster than eight miles an hour!"

    That isn't denial.

    It's defiance.

    Warlock Dark

    Warlock Dark isn't an escape from reality.

    He's the part of me that refuses to surrender to it.

    The Wiccan magician.

    The Gnostic seeker.

    The stubborn human being who keeps getting back up, even when life keeps knocking him down.

    He laughs in the face of suffering.

    Not because suffering is funny.

    Because refusing to laugh lets suffering win.

    The Day My World view Changed

    Last year I briefly died.

    For a few seconds, there was only darkness.

    No tunnel.

    No voices.

    No angels.

    No guides.

    Just silence.

    I don't claim that proves anything about what happens after death.

    It was my experience, and others have had very different ones.

    But it changed me.

    It made me wonder whether we spend too much time waiting for someone else to save us.

    Maybe we carry far more responsibility than we like to admit.

    We create.

    We destroy.

    We shape one another's lives.

    We can lift people up.

    We can break them down.

    In that sense, perhaps the greatest power we possess isn't supernatural at all.

    It's the power we have over each other.

    That thought is both unsettling and strangely liberating.

    So What Do I Believe?

    I believe in respecting nature.

    I believe in seeking wisdom instead of certainty.

    I believe in compassion over cruelty.

    I believe that laughter is a weapon against despair.

    I believe that illness may change the body without defeating the spirit.

    And I believe that if there is any real magic in this world...

    It begins with how we choose to live, how we treat one another, and whether we have the courage to keep asking questions.

    The rest?

    The universe can keep its secrets a little longer.

    sending everyone peace healing love and light, no matter who or where you are in this weird world of ours... I could write so much of my weird experiences, people would not believe what has happened to me in my life... no one ever listened to me more fool them, they sent me hate I send them love hahaha one things for sure nothings for sure, get MS get rid of friends who are assholes and family even, brothers, sisters, mothers, uncaring fuckers that’s for sure.. and then gain new friends who understand what you are going through and don’t judge because once you know you know... I have come to the conclusion the only people who understand me are others who are like me who are disabled with chronic illness ... it makes US different whether we have visible or non visible disabilities

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)
    ☣ This Is Not A Blog About MS This Is My Life With MS ☣

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction, and use AI to help solve this issue so you can understand it lol

    What Is My Living Hell

    People often think this blog is about Multiple Sclerosis.

    It isn't.

    MS is simply the landscape.

    This blog is about what happens when the landscape beneath your feet begins to move.

    It's about discovering that your body and your mind aren't always in agreement.

    It's about asking questions that neurologists don't pretend to answer.

    Who am I when my legs refuse to walk?

    Who is thinking the thoughts that my damaged brain struggles to express?

    Is consciousness nothing more than electrical impulses, or is there something deeper quietly watching the chaos unfold?

    I don't claim to have the answers.

    Some days I lean towards neuroscience.

    Other days I wander into Gnosticism, Wicca, Jung, quantum speculation, psychedelics, folklore, or the strange stories whispered around campfires.

    Not because I think they replace medicine.

    They don't.

    MS deserves evidence-based treatment, and I would never suggest otherwise.

    But while medicine explains what is happening to my nervous system, philosophy and spirituality help me ask what it means to live through it.

    Somewhere between MRI scanners and ancient myths...

    ...between mobility scooters and mushroom circles...

    ...between neurologists and trickster spirits...

    ...I keep searching.

    Perhaps that's what this blog has always been.

    Not a search for a cure.

    A search for understanding.

    If you're willing to walk that path with me—however slowly—welcome.

    Pull up a chair.

    The kettle's on.

    The universe is about to get weird.

    Wishing all the readers of this blog, peace healing love and light.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.) This Is Not A Blog About MS This Is My Life With MS

    X@goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction. AI helps with written content or it would be a hard confusing read

    Good morning, afternoon fellow humanoids and NHI...

    ...and a warm welcome to anyone who has accidentally wandered into this corner of organised neurological chaos.

    Today's public service announcement is aimed at the healthy population.

    Don't panic.

    Nobody is asking you to perform brain surgery.

    Nobody expects you to memorise the immune system.

    You simply need to master the incredibly difficult skill of opening your mouth without your brain immediately taking annual leave.

    Apparently this is harder than it looks.

    Living with Multiple Sclerosis means you hear the same comments over...

    and over...

    and over...

    until eventually you're tempted to fake your own death simply to avoid hearing them again.

    So, in the interests of humanity, here is...

    A Beginner's Guide to Talking to Someone With MS Rule One

    If you don't understand MS...

    don't explain MS.

    This sounds obvious.

    Apparently it isn't.

    "But you look well."

    Thank you.

    So did the Titanic before it hit the iceberg.

    MS doesn't come with flashing lights, smoke pouring from your ears or a zombie complexion.

    Most of us become Olympic-standard actors.

    We're experts at pretending everything is fine while our nervous system quietly conducts a house fire behind the scenes.

    Looking well simply means we've become very good at suffering discreetly.

    "My aunt's neighbour's dog walker had MS..."

    Fantastic.

    Did they also have my MRI?

    My lesions?

    My nervous system?

    My medical history?

    No?

    Then we're probably comparing completely different diseases that merely share the same name.

    MS is like snowflakes.

    Except instead of being beautiful and festive...

    every one tries to ruin your life differently.

    "Have you tried yoga?"

    No.

    Because clearly twenty years of neurologists somehow overlooked stretching.

    You've done it.

    You've solved neurology.

    Somebody call Stockholm.

    The Nobel Prize committee are waiting.

    "Maybe it's stress."

    Yes.

    Having a brain that occasionally forgets how legs work can be a little stressful.

    Excellent observation.

    "Everything happens for a reason."

    If the reason involves my immune system trying to assassinate my spinal cord...

    I'd quite like to have a word with management.

    "At least it's not..."

    Stop.

    Just...

    stop.

    Pain isn't the Olympics.

    Nobody wins the gold medal for suffering.

    There is no podium.

    No national anthem.

    No commemorative tea towel.

    "You should stay positive."

    I do.

    Most days.

    Other days I discover my left leg has resigned without giving notice.

    Positivity doesn't repair damaged myelin.

    If it did, the NHS would simply prescribe motivational posters.

    "You don't need that mobility scooter."

    Correct.

    I bought it because I enjoy being overtaken by pensioners pushing shopping trolleys.

    Nothing says freedom quite like crawling uphill at four miles an hour while traffic forms a small county behind you.

    "You're too young to be disabled."

    You're too old to be saying something that stupid.

    "Have you tried this miracle supplement?"

    Ah yes...

    the mysterious powder discovered by somebody's cousin on Facebook.

    Amazing how the entire neurological community somehow missed this miracle cure that's apparently available for £39.99 plus postage.

    Things You CAN Actually Say

    "I'm sorry you're having a rough day."

    "I'm here if you need anything."

    "Would you like me to carry that?"

    "Fancy a cuppa?"

    Congratulations.

    You've just demonstrated more emotional intelligence than half the internet.

    Final Thoughts

    People rarely mean to be hurtful.

    Most simply don't know what to say.

    Unfortunately...

    many decide that not knowing what to say is an excellent reason to say absolutely everything that falls out of their mouth.

    Living with MS isn't about wanting sympathy.

    It's about wanting people to realise that invisible doesn't mean imaginary.

    Some days we're walking.

    Some days we're limping.

    Some days we're rolling around on mobility scooters pretending we're auditioning for Mad Max: Disabled Road Warriors.

    The illness changes.

    The symptoms change.

    The pain changes.

    The fatigue changes.

    What never changes...

    is how refreshing it is when somebody simply treats you like a human being instead of a medical mystery wrapped inside an inspirational Facebook quote.

    Until next time...

    Try not to accidentally cure anybody with yoga.

    The neurologists get terribly upset.

    Final Thought

    If you've got MS, share this with somebody who means well but accidentally speaks before engaging their central nervous system.

    They might just learn something.

    still peace healing love and light to all who read this blog

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. AI help with written content

    Good morning, fellow humanoids, NHI, accidental visitors and whatever else may be reading this blog from behind the veil.

    It is Saturday morning, so I wish you all a happy weekend or at least a weekend involving fewer neurological catastrophes, unreliable taxis and near-death descents on mobility equipment than mine.

    Yesterday was a Friday from hell.

    Admittedly, it eventually developed into a rather pleasant Friday afternoon, but only after spending the morning enthusiastically dragging me through several circles of Dante’s accessible parking area.

    The MS Curse Awakens

    I woke at my usual time of six o’clock with the entire left-hand side of my body giving me its customary warm welcome.

    By “warm welcome”, I mean terrible pain.

    The sort of pain that makes opening your eyes feel like an administrative error.

    My blood pressure had also decided to explore the lower levels of human survival. I felt dreadful before getting out of bed, and considerably worse once I attempted the ambitious medical procedure known as “standing up to get some food”.

    I remember thinking:

    Well, this is a promising start.

    It was clearly going to be one of those days when my body cancelled all scheduled activities without consulting management.

    I took my prescribed medical cannabis and THC/CBD oil. I also had vitamin D with K2, vitamin C and magnesium.

    Gradually, things began to improve or at least retreat from “immediate exorcism required” to “possibly fit for limited public viewing”.

    My head still felt as though it had been posted to another dimension and was being repeatedly struck with a cosmic mallet.

    Then came the existential dread.

    People often tell you to remain positive. This is excellent advice when your nervous system is not behaving like a condemned Victorian electrical installation.

    Sometimes positivity is possible.

    Sometimes your brain merely replies:

    Absolutely not. Today we shall stare into the abyss.

    I call it the MS Curse.

    It is the strange natural law by which every carefully arranged plan is immediately attacked by pain, fatigue, dizziness, spasms, brain fog or some entirely new symptom released as part of the latest neurological update.

    Taxi? Did Somebody Call a Taxi?

    The previous day, Albertine had booked a taxi to collect us at 11:30 and take us to the tattoo studio for my midday appointment.

    At 11:30, we were outside the bungalow waiting.

    There was no taxi.

    At 11:40, there was still no taxi.

    By 11:45, the taxi had apparently entered the same mysterious dimension as my functioning nervous system.

    Albertine telephoned the company and was told that the driver was still around half an hour away. They could not reach us for at least another twenty minutes.

    My appointment was at twelve.

    Marvelous.

    This was especially inconvenient because Albertine had almost chopped the top of her finger off on Tuesday. It had been left hanging on by a small piece of skin, which is generally considered a poor condition in which to operate a motor vehicle.

    She had already needed treatment from the plastic-surgery team and was therefore unable to drive.

    I was feeling dreadful and could not safely drive either.

    The taxi company, meanwhile, had apparently adopted the philosophical position that time is merely a social construct.

    I became rather angry.

    I had been trying to arrange this tattoo for a long time. I had finally found the right tattooist, and I did not want to waste her time or fail to turn up.

    There was only one option left.

    Unfortunately, it had three wheels.

    My Saviour: The Three-Wheeled Trolley of Death

    We went into the garage and unplugged the three-wheeled scooter of death from its charger.

    I looked at it.

    It looked back at me.

    Possibly.

    I had around ten minutes to reach the tattoo studio.

    “Please,” I thought, “do not let me down today of all days.”

    I climbed aboard, pulled the throttle back and unleashed the full, terrifying fury of approximately eight miles per hour.

    Off I went.

    Not so much roaring down the road as trundling towards destiny with a shopping basket.

    I must have looked completely demented: a wobbly man hurtling through the streets on a three-wheeled mobility scooter, travelling at top speed while simultaneously going nowhere particularly quickly.

    It was the slowest high-speed pursuit in British history.

    Somehow, despite feeling dreadful, I reached the tattoo studio at around twelve o’clock.

    The trolley of death had not missed a beat.

    I parked it outside with a wry smile.

    For once, a piece of equipment in my life had performed exactly as intended.

    Naturally, I found this deeply suspicious.

    At the Tattoo Studio

    I climbed off the scooter and walked into the studio with the help of my stick.

    I was extremely determined.

    I was also extremely wobbly.

    Each step carried the exciting possibility of an unscheduled meeting with the floor. Thankfully, it was only a short distance, although being knocked over outside the shop would have added a pleasingly dramatic final act to the morning.

    The tattooist greeted me warmly and immediately put me at ease.

    She was friendly, gentle and extremely knowledgeable. The entire experience was fantastic and one of the most pleasant things I have done in a long time.

    The tattoo itself is amazing.

    Honestly, it is perfect.

    She was so gentle that I barely felt a thing. Of course, when you already have reduced sensation in your hand, getting tattooed becomes one of the few occasions when neurological numbness comes with a customer benefit.

    It felt like little more than a faint pinch.

    Things have changed considerably since my last tattoo. The equipment and techniques have moved forward, and I was surprised by how calm and comfortable the whole procedure was.

    After a morning dominated by pain, low blood pressure and transport incompetence, sitting in a tattoo studio somehow became the restful part of the day.

    Life is peculiar like that.

    Going Home: Oh Dear God

    I left the studio, climbed back onto the three-wheeled trolley of death and admired my new tattoo.

    It looked absolutely awesome.

    There was no pain. No trouble. Nothing.

    For a brief and dangerous moment, I believed things were going well.

    Then I attempted to go home.

    The road from the tattoo studio leads down a fairly steep hill. Unfortunately, I took the wrong turning and became completely lost.

    I spent around ten minutes riding in circles, wondering where the hell I was.

    Everything looked the same.

    Every building appeared to have been copied and pasted by a bored simulation designer.

    I eventually went up a slight incline, believing it would lead to the main car park.

    It did not.

    Instead, it delivered me to the top of a narrow and extremely steep hill, barely wide enough for one car.

    I asked a nearby woman for directions to the main car park.

    She looked at the hill.

    She looked at my scooter.

    Then she looked at me with the unmistakable expression of someone preparing to become a witness.

    She explained that the hill was extremely steep and seemed genuinely uncertain whether I would reach the bottom safely.

    This was reassuring.

    As regular readers may know, the brakes on the three-wheeled trolley of death are not its strongest feature.

    They are less “precision braking system” and more “polite written request to reduce speed”.

    Nevertheless, down I went.

    Slowly.

    Precariously.

    Possibly accompanied by the distant laughter of Death, who had apparently taken the afternoon off but was still checking his emails.

    Somehow, I reached the bottom without overturning, colliding with anything or becoming a local-news item.

    From there, I found the car park and eventually made my way home.

    A Friday of Two Halves

    The day began with terrible pain, low blood pressure, neurological misery and the familiar feeling that MS had torn up my plans for its own amusement.

    Then the taxi failed to appear.

    Albertine could not drive because of her injured finger.

    I was forced to race through town at eight miles per hour on a three-wheeled mobility scooter.

    I got my tattoo.

    I became lost.

    I descended a hill on brakes apparently designed by someone who disliked disabled people.

    And somehow, I got home safely.

    All in all, it was quite an experience.

    The morning came directly from hell.

    The afternoon, unexpectedly, was rather lovely.

    And the three-wheeled trolley of death?

    It performed magnificently.

    I may have to promote it to Three-Wheeled Trolley of Mildly Reckless Salvation.

    But let us not get carried away.

    It still has those brakes.

    Survival Report Pain: ★★★★☆ Brain Fog: ★★★★★ Near-Death Experiences: 2 Taxi Reliability: -3/10 Scooter Heroics: Legendary Humour Level: Still Operational.

    Today's Lesson: Never trust a taxi. Always trust the Three-Wheeled Trolley of Death. MS doesn't make appointments... it cancels them.

    wishing everyone peace healing love and light no matter who you are

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. some AI help with written content Hello fellow humanoids,nhi and readers of my blog ! There's a special place in social interaction reserved for people who hear the words I have Multiple Sclerosis and immediately transform into a neurologist, motivational speaker and wellness guru all at once. You don’t look sick. Have you tried yoga? You just need to stay positive. It's almost beautiful. Almost.

    Living with MS means learning to navigate relapses, fatigue, pain, brain fog, medications, hospital appointments and the occasional argument with your own legs.

    What it shouldn't mean is having to politely smile while someone explains how a gluten-free smoothie apparently knows more than your neurologist.

    So, in the interests of public education—and preserving what's left of our patience—here are ten phrases we'd happily launch into the sun.

    1. "But You Don't Look Sick."

    Oh, thank God.

    I was worried I'd accidentally left my "Chronically Ill" name badge at home.

    What exactly does illness look like?

    Should I drag an IV stand behind me?

    Carry an MRI scan in Tesco?

    Wear a flashing sign that says,

    "WARNING: MY IMMUNE SYSTEM HAS CHOSEN VIOLENCE."

    Invisible illnesses don't stop existing simply because they're inconvenient for spectators.

    Neither does common sense, although social media continues to test that theory.

    2. "Have You Tried Yoga?"

    Yes.

    I've also tried medication.

    Physiotherapy.

    Exercise.

    Rest.

    Different diets.

    Mindfulness.

    Supplements.

    Swearing.

    Crying.

    Questioning the universe.

    Believe it or not, most people living with MS spend considerably more time managing their condition than strangers spend thinking about it.

    Yoga can help some people.

    It is not the magical password that causes autoimmune diseases to politely pack their bags and leave.

    3. "At Least It's Not Cancer."

    Ah yes.

    The Chronic Illness Olympics.

    Where apparently suffering must be ranked on a leader board.

    Pain isn't a competition.

    Neither is disability.

    Nobody wins because somebody else has it worse.

    That's like telling someone whose house is on fire,

    "Could be worse...

    ...the neighbour's exploded."

    Technically true.

    Still unhelpful.

    4. "You're Too Young."

    Tell that to my immune system.

    It clearly didn't read the age requirements.

    MS commonly appears in younger adults.

    Autoimmune diseases aren't checking passports before causing trouble.

    5. "My Friend Has MS And They're Fine."

    Excellent.

    My neighbour owns a goldfish.

    That tells me absolutely nothing about sharks.

    No two cases of MS are identical.

    Some people run marathons.

    Some need walking aids.

    Some work full-time.

    Others can't.

    Comparing people with MS is like comparing weather in Britain.

    Completely unpredictable and usually disappointing.

    6. "You Just Need To Stay Positive."

    Wonderful.

    Why didn't decades of neurological research think of that?

    Someone ring every hospital immediately.

    We've solved autoimmune disease.

    Positivity helps mental wellbeing.

    It does not magically repair damaged myelin.

    If optimism cured neurological conditions, the NHS waiting lists would disappear overnight.

    7. "Google Says..."

    Stop.

    Google also says I have seventeen rare cancers every time I search for a headache.

    Search engines are fantastic.

    For recipes.

    Maps.

    Cat videos.

    They are not neurologists.

    Nor should they be trusted over the person who spent fifteen years becoming one.

    8. "You Were Fine Yesterday."

    Correct.

    Yesterday I also remembered where I left my keys.

    Today?

    Different story.

    MS symptoms fluctuate.

    Some days are manageable.

    Some days feel like walking through wet concrete while someone repeatedly presses the low-battery warning in your brain.

    That's the nature of the disease.

    It doesn't ask permission before changing the rules.

    9. "You Don't Need That Disabled Parking Space."

    Ah yes.

    The Disability Inspector has arrived.

    Armed with absolutely no qualifications.

    Not every disability involves a wheelchair.

    Not every mobility issue is visible.

    Not every painful journey begins when you step out of the car.

    Some begin before breakfast.

    Mind your own trolley.

    10. "Everything Happens For A Reason."

    Really?

    Go on then.

    Explain autoimmune disease.

    I'll wait.

    Some things happen because biology occasionally decides to throw a spectacular tantrum.

    Not every illness has a hidden lesson.

    Sometimes terrible things simply happen.

    The lesson comes afterwards—in resilience, humour, kindness and learning to laugh because crying gets exhausting.

    Honourable Mentions

    These narrowly missed the Top Ten:

    • "You should try this miracle supplement."

    • "My aunt cured hers with celery juice."

    • "Have you prayed about it?"

    • "It's probably stress."

    • "Maybe you're just getting older."

    • "You're so brave."

    (Translation: "I genuinely have no idea what else to say.")

    The Reality

    Most people who say these things aren't cruel.

    They're uncomfortable.

    They don't know what to say.

    Unfortunately, not knowing what to say often results in saying something spectacularly ridiculous.

    Here's a radical alternative.

    Instead of offering advice...

    Ask.

    Instead of assuming...

    Listen.

    Instead of explaining someone else's illness to them...

    Don't.

    It's astonishing how effective silence can be when it's paired with compassion.

    Final Thoughts

    MS doesn't need your miracle cure.

    It doesn't care about your Facebook research.

    It certainly isn't interested in your cousin's chiropractor.

    What people living with MS actually need is understanding.

    Patience.

    Accessibility.

    And perhaps—just perhaps—a world where strangers stop believing they've completed medical school because they once watched a wellness documentary narrated by someone who also sells detox tea.

    Until then...

    We'll keep smiling.

    Mostly because if we don't laugh at the nonsense...

    We'll end up throwing herbal supplements at people.

    And honestly?

    Those things are expensive.

    wishing everyone no matter who reads this blog ,peace healing love and light.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. AI help to make it less confusing

    A Rough Morning That Set the Tone for the Day

    Well, a very good morning to you all..humanoids and NHI out there who are reading my blog today.

    This week has been one I’d quite happily forget. It all started off well enough: I was sitting in my computer chair, which isn’t that old, when I suddenly heard a loud crack. Before I knew it, I was on the floor—the back of the chair had completely given way. I’m not exactly that heavy, and the chair wasn’t even five years old, so I do wonder what sort of quality it was. It must have been rubbish.

    The Painful Consequence

    The result? A completely wrecked back that’s now incredibly painful.

    A Series of Small Disasters

    Albertine went into the garden to trim the bushes and somehow managed to almost cut her finger off. It was hanging on by what felt like a thread, so we drove to our local hospital, where they bandaged it up before referring her to the main Hospital to see a plastic surgeon.

    That meant another early start. Of course, having an early appointment doesn’t help when the hospital parking is a nightmare. We left two hours before the appointment, yet it still took us twenty minutes to find a parking space. Unbelievable… and that was only 8:30 am.

    The Road Trip in Discomfort

    To make matters worse, I had to drive. I hadn’t taken any medication so I’d be safe behind the wheel, but I felt absolutely dreadful. I haven’t driven much recently, and I really wasn’t looking forward to an 80‑mile round trip while feeling like I did.

    My autonomic dysfunction was in full swing. I had the familiar pain running down my left-hand side from my throat all the way down through my digestive system. At least I know what’s causing it the vagus nerve and the autonomic dysfunction that comes with my MS. It sounds completely crazy to anyone who hasn’t experienced it, but unfortunately it’s become part of my life.

    The “Trolley of Death” Delay

    Meanwhile, my new four‑wheeled “trolley of death” is still waiting for its DVLA registration documents. It drives beautifully, but I can’t legally take it on the road until all that’s sorted.

    A Cautionary Tale of Care and Compassion

    As I sat waiting in the hospital car park while Albertine saw the plastic surgeon, I couldn’t help feeling sorry for her. The injury was nasty, and because it went right down to the bone, there’s no knowing how long her recovery will take. Thankfully it was her left hand rather than her right, but life is going to be quite different over the next few weeks.

    Albertine also lives with rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, so she’s not exactly in the best of health anyway. It looks like we’re both in for a difficult few weeks.

    The Lack of Support

    To top it all off, our carer won’t be coming during the school holidays. Six weeks without that support. Oh joy…

    A Heavy Load of Physical and Emotional Strain

    I’m really not feeling well at the moment. Between the autonomic dysfunction, severe histamine reactions, and everything else, it’s becoming exhausting.

    On a stranger note, the weirdness continues. There have been more lights and orbs around the house, and I’ve spoken to other people who have seen the same “sepia” type beings and the same liminal shapes that I’ve been seeing. We’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps it’s something to do with the way my brain is wired. Maybe my MS and the changes in my nervous system allow me to notice patterns that most people simply don’t see.

    A Long Career, A New Reality

    As many of you know, I’ve been a psychic reader for many years and worked professionally for over thirty years alongside running my own computer and website business. Looking back, I honestly don’t know how I managed it sometimes. The constant changes in technology and legislation were exhausting. I’m certainly glad I’m retired now, even if living on the State Pension means every penny has to be watched.

    The Rising Cost of Living

    The cost of living is becoming ridiculous. Food prices are unbelievable, electricity costs are frightening, and fuel isn’t much better. I honestly don’t know how many people are surviving. Last winter we barely put the heating on because we simply couldn’t afford it.

    How Do I Feel About Everything?

    To be honest… I’m mightily fed up. When I look back over my life, it often feels as though I’ve taken one step forward and three steps back. But despite all of that, I can honestly say I’m still a happy man. I love my wife. I love my children. Those things matter more than anything else.

    I do notice, however, that my emotions are changing. It’s becoming harder to express how I feel. My empathy is still there, but it’s different somehow, almost muted. Whether that’s age, illness, or simply years of fighting, I honestly don’t know.

    At 67, I’m realistic about life. None of us knows how long we’ve got left, so I try not to dwell on it too much.

    If anyone reading this feels depressed after reading it, please don’t. Life is still worth living. Sometimes you just have to adapt and keep moving forward.

    A History of Accidents and Triumph

    Looking back, I’ve had more than my fair share of accidents. I’ve broken both shoulders, broken nearly every toe, collected cuts where I really shouldn’t have collected cuts, and generally done a good impression of someone who has upset the gods of balance.

    But there is another side to the story.

    Since being diagnosed with MS, I’ve actually achieved more than I ever thought possible. I went to university, became a teacher in adult special education, built and ran my own business for over twenty years, and kept fighting every single day.

    Oddly enough, I sometimes wonder whether I’d have achieved those things if I hadn’t developed MS. The disease challenged me every single day, and perhaps that’s what drove me to keep proving to myself that I could still do things.

    People who don’t have MS will never truly understand what it’s like. The pain. The muscle spasms. The brain fog. The memory problems. The exhaustion. The strange sensations. The feeling that your own nervous system has declared war on you.

    Yet somehow, even on one of my worst days, I still found myself driving my wife to hospital because that’s simply what needed to be done.

    A Moment of Reflection

    Right now I feel dreadful. I’m in pain, my mouth tastes of metal, and my head feels very strange. But such is life.

    One thing I am grateful for is AI. On days like today, when my brain simply won’t cooperate, I can dictate everything into my phone, let AI untangle the mess, and somehow end up with something that resembles a blog post. It’s become a genuinely useful tool for helping me communicate when my MS refuses to let my brain do the job properly.

    Closing Wishes

    So, wherever you are in the world, whoever you are, I wish you peace, healing, love, and light. And remember…

    Take things easy.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ This blog shares my personal, sometimes painful experiences with MS and mental health. My intention is to speak honestly and offer solidarity—not to harm or replace professional advice. I’m not a doctor or therapist, just someone who gets how hard it can get. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend, support group, or professional. You deserve help and hope.⚠️

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. some AI help written content

    A brutally honest Saturday ramble about mobility scooters, MS, healthcare, tattoos, MOTs, Linux, heat, disability and the strange behaviour of people who have apparently never seen a wheelchair before.

    🌅 Morning (Or Afternoon? Who the Hell Knows) Musings

    Ah, Saturday. Or is it Sunday? Does it even matter when every day is a glorious battle against gravity, stupidity, and the DVLA? This morning, I took my three-wheeled trolley of impending doom (also known as my mobility scooter) out for a spin. Steep hills? Oh, absolutely. Because nothing says "I’m alive" like inching up a slope at the speed of a snail on sedatives, while motorists behind you silently question their life choices. And yes, I do pull over to let them pass—because even I have mercy. Mostly. But here’s the kicker: The front headset is coming loose again. Tighten it? It loosens. Ignore it? It definitely loosens. So now it’s off the road for repairs, because nothing says "I’m a responsible adult" like a wobbly death machine.

    🏥 The NHS: A Comedy of Errors (But Not the Funny Kind)

    I almost got to speak to my neurologist this week. Almost. Instead, I got the MS nurse, which is like ordering a steak and getting a napkin. Still, progress! Slow, painful, bureaucratic progress. Meanwhile, my new mobility scooter is sitting pretty—illegally—because the DVLA has decided that three weeks is a reasonable time to process a registration. Three. Weeks. At this rate, I’ll be dead before the paperwork clears. But hey, at least I’ve got a tattoo appointment next Friday! Because nothing says "I’m numb from MS" like voluntarily stabbing myself with needles. Let’s hope the area doesn’t turn hypersensitive, because that’s a special kind of hell I’ve visited before.

    🚗 Rusty 1: The Camper Van That Refuses to Die

    Rusty 1 (my trusty Vivaro) passed its MOT—after new brake discs and pads, because of course it did. Now it’s legal for another year, which is more than I can say for my patience with the DVLA. PSA: If anyone wants to buy a 2005 Vivaro camper van for £5,000 or nearest offer, hit me up. It’s in decent nick, just needs a few minor things (read: it’s fine, stop worrying).

    🔥 The Sun: My Personal Nemesis

    This week, my house hit 30°C. THIRTY. DEGREES. For those of you who don’t speak "British Summer", that’s basically the surface of the sun. Windows open, fans blasting, and me—melting like a witch in Oz. And the antihistamines? I’m basically mainlining them at this point. Histamines are the real villains of my life, turning my body into a betrayal-themed piñata.

    💻 Tech Wars: Linux vs. Windows (Spoiler: I Win)

    After a year of blood, sweat, and brain fog, I’ve finally tamed my mini PCs.

    Geekcom Mini PC: Swapped Windows 11 for Zorin Linux—flies like a dream. (10/10, would recommend, Bluetooth is a lie.) HX90: Switched back to Windows 10 because some programs are stubborn bastards that refuse to play nice with Linux. Now I have the best of both worlds—peak performance until it isn’t. AI helps me write because my MS brain jumps from topic to topic like a caffeinated squirrel.

    🚪 No Cold Callers: The Magic Sign

    Pro tip for the disabled: Slap a "NO COLD CALLERS" sign on your door. Works like a charm. Jehovah’s Witnesses? Gone. Random salespeople? Vanished. My appearance helps too—67, long hair, ZZ Top beard, wheelchair. Most people take one look and bolt. The ones who do approach? I tell them my condition is catching. Watch them sprint away in terror. 10/10, would gaslight again.

    🧠 Cognitive Dysfunction: The Uninvited Guest

    My brain’s been extra chaotic lately. MS means my thoughts are like a browser with 50 tabs open—all crashing. Writing? Forget it. Spelling? A joke. But AI helps, because even my pride has limits. And yes, doctors are using AI to triage patients. Finally, a system that won’t judge me for forgetting my own name.

    💉 Final Thoughts: Hydrate or Diedrate

    Stay hydrated. Gut health is king. And if you see me on my scooter, don’t stare,unless you want me to laugh in your face. Peace, healing, love, and light to all who read this. Have a most excellent weekend or don’t, I’m not your mum. Remember: If life gives you MS, make dark humour and questionable life choices.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ Please read with care: This blog shares personal, sometimes painful experiences. My intention is to support and speak honestly not to harm. I’m not a professional, just someone who understands how hard it can get. If you're struggling, you're not alone please reach out for professional help.

    please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. Some AI written content

    Still good morning, good afternoon. Or hello to wherever or whomever you are, whether you're humanoid, whether you're NHI or whatever you are, a very good morning.

    🧠 THE PRINCIPLE

    Dark humor isn’t edgy. It’s engineered. It doesn’t punch down. It punches up. It doesn’t trivialize. It defuses. It doesn’t mock. It mirrors.

    🧱 EXHIBITS OF RESISTANCE

    🖋️ EXHIBIT 1: THE DIAL-UP UNIVERSE “If I stand up fast, the universe loads on dial-up.” “Body update: patches released, bugs remain.” “I’m not ghosting you, I’m pre-haunting.” Why it works: We’re not coding a game. We’re coding our existence. The body is a glitch. The mind? The debugger. We laugh — because we know we’re not done. We’re not rebooting. We’re rebooting ourselves.

    🩺 EXHIBIT 2: BUREAUCRATIC BATTLEFIELD “Any allergies?” “Yes — mornings and optimism.” “Rate your pain 1–10.” “Windows Vista.” Why it works: They want numbers. We give metaphors with teeth marks. The system is a spreadsheet. We’re the spreadsheet with a smirk.

    🚪 EXHIBIT 3: THE THRONE ON SPORT MODE “It’s not a wheelchair — it’s a throne on sport mode.” “Ramps are my red carpet — pity is not on the guest list.” Why it works: We don’t need to be “accommodated.” We choose to be “throne-sized.” We don’t apologize for our mobility. We redefine it.

    🤝 EXHIBIT 4: THE WELL-MEANING MENACE “Have you tried yoga?” “Yes. I achieved corpse pose. Nailed it.” “You’re so brave.” “Invoice sent.” Why it works: The normies want to comfort us. We want to redefine comfort. We’re not being “sassy.” We’re being strategic.

    🪖 EXHIBIT 5: THE LINE YOU DON’T CROSS Dark humor doesn’t punch down. It punches up — at fate, systems, your own rotten luck. If the joke needs a victim, it’s lazy. It’s savage. It’s calm. Why it works: We’re not laughing at the pain. We’re laughing through it. We’re not joking about suffering. We’re defusing it before it eats the furniture — and us.

    🧭 FAQ FOR THE EASILY STARTLED

    Is this unhealthy? Only if you’re the only tool. It’s a scalpel — not a sledgehammer.

    Are you trivializing suffering? No. We’re defusing it before it eats the furniture — and us.

    Can I joke like this if I’m healthy? Not about us. Laugh with us after we set the tone. You’re a guest — bring snacks.

    🧰 MICRO-TOOLKIT: USE, DON’T ABUSE

    🌟 Name the monster before it names you. You’re not the problem. You’re the observer.

    🔥 Keep one joke you never explain. Private lightning — not a public storm.

    🧭 When you can’t walk the distance, shorten the map. When you can’t shorten the map, redraw the legend.

    ⚡ You can’t outrun the system? Outrun the joke.

    💥 CLOSING SNARL: THE TRUE ARMOUR

    Dark humour is not a mask. It’s armour that fits badly — but still stops the arrow. We laugh. We proceed. We survive.

    📜 PRACTICAL NOTES — PIN THIS

    Lower the bar until it’s a trip hazard — then step over it anyway. One task = win. Two = parade. Three = coma. Music, art, writing — not hobbies. Lifelines. Anyone calling you “brave” owes £20. Same-day payment preferred.

    🌈 FINAL LINE

    We laugh. Not to escape. We laugh. To survive. We laugh. To move. We laugh. To live. We laugh. To be. Not the victim. Not the joke. Not the laugh. We’re the Armour. The joke. The laugh. The survivor.

    🚀 FINAL CALL TO ACTION

    Now — go. Laugh. Survive. Repeat. You’re not broken. You’re rebooting. And you’re not alone. We’re all laughing — through the crash, through the pain, through the absurd.

    You’ve got the manual. Now go. Laugh. Survive. Repeat. Dark Humor Survival Manual Rebooted For those who laugh while the world spins off its axis.

    Still sending everybody peace, healing, love and light, no matter who or where you are, take care. So thank you very much for reading. I do appreciate all the readers.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
    enter image description here

  • Posted on

    ⚠️ Please read with care: This blog shares personal, sometimes painful experiences. My intention is to support and speak honestly not to harm. I’m not a professional, just someone who understands how hard it can get. If you're struggling, you're not alone please reach out for professional help.

    Please remember I suffer with severe cognitive dysfunction this may be a confusing read. some AI written content

    Living with MS Through Inner Strength, Cannabis & Dark Humor

    Good afternoon fellow humanoids and N H I , Well, what can I say? Let’s get one thing out of the way early, before anyone suggests resistance bands or tells me to “just keep moving” like I’ve secretly been hoarding the ability to stand up for dramatic effect.

    I can’t.

    I’m in a power chair. That’s not a metaphor, not a bad day, not a phase I’ll stretch my way out of. That’s the situation. Full stop. So when people ask what physical therapy I do, there’s always this awkward pause where I decide how polite I feel like being. Sometimes I smile and deflect. Sometimes I think, ah yes, I’ll just hop out and jog it off, shall I?

    So no, my life isn’t built around physio routines or carefully curated gym sessions. My therapy looks nothing like the glossy leaflets. And yet, strangely enough, it works.

    Not in the “miracle cure” sense. Let’s not get ridiculous. MS doesn’t pack up and leave because you’ve found inner peace and a decent strain of cannabis. But surviving it? Living with it without losing your sense of self? That’s a different game entirely.

    And that’s where my version of therapy lives.


    The Myth of the “Right Way” to Cope

    There’s this unspoken expectation that chronic illness should come with a kind of noble discipline. You’re meant to fight it in acceptable ways. Structured ways. Ways that look good from the outside.

    You should be:

    • Doing your exercises
    • Tracking your progress
    • Staying relentlessly positive
    • Inspiring others, preferably while smiling through obvious pain

    And if you’re not doing those things, there’s a subtle implication that you’re… what, exactly? Not trying hard enough? Not coping correctly?

    Here’s the truth: there is no correct way to cope with something that rewrites your body without your permission.

    Some people find their footing in physical therapy. Good for them. Genuinely. If that works, hold onto it.

    But for those of us whose bodies have other ideas, the battlefield shifts. It becomes less about movement and more about endurance of a different kind. Mental. Emotional. Existential, if we’re being dramatic about it. Which I often am.


    My Therapy Isn’t Instagram-Friendly

    My therapy looks like this:

    Reading. Talking. Cannabis. Silence. Thought. A kind of quiet, stubborn refusal to disappear.

    Not exactly the stuff of fitness influencers.

    But let’s break it down, because each piece matters more than it probably sounds on the surface.


    Reading: Escaping Without Leaving

    When your physical world shrinks, your internal one either expands or collapses. There’s not much middle ground.

    Reading, for me, is a way of refusing to let the walls close in.

    It’s not just entertainment. It’s survival. It’s stepping into other lives, other minds, other possibilities when your own body has decided to limit the map. Books don’t care if you can walk. They don’t care if your hands shake or your energy’s shot. They just open the door and let you in.

    There’s also something quietly defiant about it. While MS chips away at certain abilities, reading sharpens others. It keeps the mind active, engaged, slightly dangerous.

    And if I’m being honest, it’s also a good distraction from the absurdity of it all. Because sometimes the reality of living with MS is so ridiculous that if you stare at it too long without a buffer, you’ll either laugh or lose your mind. Preferably both, in moderation.


    Talking: Not Just Noise

    Conversation is another lifeline, though not always in the way people expect.

    It’s not about constant chatter or forced socialising. It’s about connection that feels real. Honest conversations where you don’t have to pretend everything’s fine or package your experience into something digestible.

    There’s a particular kind of exhaustion that comes from being misunderstood repeatedly. Talking to people who actually get it, or at least try to, cuts through that.

    And sometimes, yes, it’s just about having a laugh. Dark humour, especially. If you can’t laugh at the situation, it starts laughing at you, and it’s got a much worse sense of humour.

    There’s something grounding about saying the blunt, uncomfortable truth out loud. It takes the edge off. Makes it manageable. Turns it from something looming and abstract into something you can at least look in the eye and say, “Right, you again.”


    Cannabis: Let’s Not Dance Around It

    I use cannabis. THC, CBD, the lot.

    There, said plainly, without dressing it up in euphemisms.

    For some people, that’s controversial. For me, it’s practical.

    It helps with pain. It helps with spasticity. It helps with the kind of background discomfort that never quite goes away but can be turned down from “constant screaming” to “annoying hum.”

    It also helps with something less tangible but just as important: perspective.

    There’s a softening that happens. Not a loss of clarity, despite what people assume, but a shift. The edges of everything become less sharp. The frustration, the anger, the sheer unfairness of it all doesn’t vanish, but it stops dominating the room.

    It creates space. And when you live with something like MS, space is valuable.

    No, it’s not a cure. It’s not magic. But it’s a tool. And I’ll take every useful tool I can get.


    Natural Rhythms and a Bit of Witchcraft

    I describe myself, half-jokingly but also not, as a natural Wiccan.

    Not in a performative sense. I’m not out in the woods casting elaborate spells under a full moon, though that would at least make for a better story.

    It’s more about a mindset. A way of relating to the world that isn’t purely clinical or mechanical.

    Living with MS can make your body feel like a broken machine. Something that’s malfunctioning, unreliable, frustrating. The medical model reinforces that. Everything becomes symptoms, treatments, management strategies.

    Necessary, yes. But incomplete.

    What I lean into is something more intuitive. Energy. Calm. Intention. The idea that even if my body isn’t cooperating, I can still shape my internal environment.

    Call it mindfulness if you want to sanitise it. I prefer something with a bit more character.

    It’s about creating moments of stillness that aren’t empty but full. Where you’re not fighting your body or resenting it, just existing alongside it.

    Some days that looks like quiet reflection. Other days it’s just sitting there, breathing, thinking, “Well, this is what we’ve got. Let’s work with it.”

    There’s a strange kind of strength in that. Not loud or visible, but steady.


    Stillness Isn’t Weakness

    This is probably the biggest misconception.

    If you’re not moving, not actively doing, not visibly pushing forward, people assume you’ve stopped. Given up. Settled.

    But stillness can be an act of defiance.

    When your body limits your movement, choosing not to let that define your entire existence is a form of resistance. You’re still here. Still thinking, feeling, observing, adapting.

    Strength doesn’t always look like action. Sometimes it looks like endurance. Sometimes it looks like sitting in a chair and refusing to disappear, even when everything’s telling you it would be easier to fade into the background.

    There’s nothing passive about that.


    Dark Humour: The Unsung Therapy

    Let’s talk about humour, specifically the darker variety.

    Because if you’re dealing with something like MS and you don’t develop a slightly warped sense of humour, I don’t know how you cope.

    There’s an absurdity to the whole situation that practically demands it.

    Your body does something ridiculous. You respond with, “Brilliant, love that for me.” Not because it’s actually brilliant, but because the alternative is constant outrage, and that’s exhausting.

    Dark humour creates distance. It lets you acknowledge how bad something is without being completely consumed by it.

    It also tends to weed out people who can’t handle reality. If someone’s uncomfortable with you joking about your own condition, that’s usually a sign they’re more invested in their idea of your experience than the actual thing.

    And frankly, life’s too short, even when it feels very long, to cater to that.


    Blunt Truth: This Isn’t Inspirational

    I’m not here to be inspiring.

    That’s another expectation that gets quietly placed on people with chronic illness. That we should somehow turn our experience into something uplifting for others.

    Sometimes it is. Sometimes there are moments of clarity, resilience, even a kind of rough beauty in how you adapt.

    Other times, it’s just difficult. Frustrating. Boring, even. A long stretch of managing, adjusting, getting through the day.

    And that’s fine.

    You don’t need to turn your life into a lesson for anyone else. You just need to live it in a way that makes it bearable, maybe even meaningful on your own terms.


    What Actually Keeps Me Going

    At the center of all of this isn’t any one practice or habit.

    It’s something harder to define. Inner strength, if you want a simple label, though that doesn’t quite capture it.

    It’s more like a refusal.

    A refusal to let MS strip away everything that makes me me. A refusal to be reduced to a diagnosis, a chair, a list of limitations.

    The beliefs I hold, the way I see the world, the quiet rituals of thought and presence and, yes, the occasional chemically-assisted perspective shift, all feed into that.

    It’s not neat. It’s not structured. It wouldn’t fit into a treatment plan.

    But it works.


    Final Thought, No Sugarcoating

    If you’re looking for a tidy conclusion, something uplifting and neatly packaged, this isn’t that.

    Living with MS isn’t tidy.

    But it is livable.

    Not by following someone else’s blueprint, but by building your own, piece by piece, out of whatever works. Even if it looks unconventional. Especially if it does.

    So no, I don’t do physical therapy.

    I do something else entirely.

    And it keeps me here.

    Which, all things considered, is a solid result.

    so I'm sending you all out there peace-healing love and light, no matter whom or whatever you are, or wherever you are in this world.

    Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)

    @goblinbloggeruk - sick@mylivinghell.co.uk
    𒀭𒊩𒆳 ᛞᚱᚨᚷᛟᚾ ᛏᚱᚨᚾᛋᚲᚺᚱᛁᛖᛞ ✦ ᚹᚨᛏᚲᚺᛖᚱ 𒀸𒀭 ᚢᚾᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ
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