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⚠️ Please read with care: This blog shares personal, sometimes painful experiences. My intention is to support and speak honestly not to harm. I’m not a professional, just someone who understands how hard it can get. If you're struggling, you're not alone please reach out for professional help.
The Day SoundCloud Broke Me
So yes, I decided I was going to do a spoken blog. A podcast, as the young ones call it. I thought, I know SoundCloud! It sounded cool, right? Took me the better part of a day just to work out how to get the bloody thing working. My head felt like porridge. Thick, slow, and slightly burnt.
And here’s the kicker there were no proper help files. None. Just endless “click here” nonsense that didn’t tell you what any of it meant. Categories? Forget it. I wanted something like health, MS, disability, ranting man in a power chair but apparently, SoundCloud only understands “hip-hop” and “deep house”.
In the end, I managed to upload it. Two listens. And those two were me and Albertine. Brilliant.
The Fogged Mind vs The Digital Void
Trying to navigate software while your brain is busy running Windows 95 on half a stick of RAM is pure torture. Years ago, I’d have breezed through this. Now? My brain hits that cognitive wall and just slams shut. Pain behind the eyes, words disappearing mid-sentence, kittens mewing somewhere in the background and I’m shouting at my computer like it owes me rent.
And this is where I admit it: technology beats me sometimes. Not because I’m stupid. Not because I’ve lost interest. But because MS eats focus like a vampire eats virgins.
Onward, to Spotify (or Madness)
So, next plan: I’m going to try Spotify for Podcasters. Maybe it’ll work. Maybe it’ll eat my brain again. But I’ve come this far, and I’m not about to stop now.
Because this voice my voice deserves to be heard. Even if it’s fogged, cracked, and full of swear words that my editing AI politely erases.
To anyone out there who actually knows what they’re doing and can help me you are my hero. There will be a special place for you in My Living Hell, complete with eternal gratitude and possibly biscuits.
For now, I’ll just sit here, hurting, tired, kittens mewing, brain screaming, and muttering to myself like an old wizard fighting a Wi-Fi demon.
Because that’s life with MS. You fight the fog, the pain, and sometimes, SoundCloud itself.
Warlock Dark Chronic illness survivor, truth-teller, occasional bastard. From My Living Hell (For those who came here by accident: yes, my living hell is real. And yes, we still fight. Every shitty day. With defiance.)
